“I give myself a B. I’m a competitor and I love to get my hand raised…” – Andre Ward
Hola familia y amigos, welcome to a disappointing and utterly one-dimensional episode of Central America’s highest rated, most money-spinning weekly proper pugilistic paper, The Sunday Brunch – We are coming off of a two year hiatus to face the brutalized and bifurcated corpse of the bicycle zombie from AMC’s The Walking Dead season one, episode one – and we’re going to kick its fucking ass. This week we’re chopping up some of the fights that took place over the weekend and we are confident that after this Sunday Brunch is over and done with, we will officially be banned from ever going to Oakland, California. With that said, I gave you your instructions in the dressing room, what I say you must obey; cuidate, escucha mi y toca los manos…Let’s get it on!
Andre Ward is a good fighter.
At one point in time he was in a very small, elite group of boxers right at the tippy top of the sport.
But, let’s face facts. Ward’s inactivity has affected his ability. I know a lot of people think (and at one time probably rightly so) that Andre Ward is second only to Floyd Mayweather in terms of skill set and in-ring ability.
I contend that any fighter who is coming off of a long break is entitled to a tune-up style of a fight. The only problem I have with last night’s Paul Smith rape is that people were enamored with how well Andre Ward did…
Of fucking course he did well. He’s a former Olympic gold medalist! The guy he faced barely threw a punch for the entire time he was allowed to share the ring with Ward – only landing 47 total shots. If you put the skeleton of Bert Sugar in the ring with an Everlast heavy bag, he’s going to look good regardless of how much time he spent in the coffin.
I’ve seen better opposition from some of Kimbo Slice’s Youtube Miami street fights.
Not to compare Ward with Mayweather (oh, wait. Most of you do compare the two), but when Floyd Mayweather came off of a 21 month “retirement”, he faced the then consensus number two “pound for pound” fighter in the world, Juan Manuel Marquez.
I’m just saying, there’s levels to this game.
On to Adrien Broner.
The clown known as “The Problem” has been proving himself to be no problem at all for fighters who flirt with the upper tiers of the sport.
Broner, who reportedly turned down a 40 million dollar contract from Roc Nation Sports, earned 1.35M for his “effort” against “Showtime” Shawn Porter.
Adrien Broner did a lot of holding (up to 70 times according to some accounts), he did a lot of face-palming and even some illegal behind-the-head style pitty pat jibber jabs, but none of his antics deterred Shawn Porter from stealing the show.
Well, he did have that one nice knockdown in the final round, but that could be attributed to Porter’s irresponsible defense as much as it can be called a brilliant shot from Broner…
In fact, Adrien Broner had such minimal activity that “Showtime” literally threw 300 more punches than did the brash 25 year-old … who, I think, is the only fighter to ever make his grand arrival on a Future Foot (the Segue without handlebars thing he was riding).
In other fake news…
Why does everyone have such a big problem with Al Haymon taking boxing to mainstream T.V. for FREE? In most other countries the American broadcasts of HBO and Showtime, even Pay-Per-View events are generally free or are offered at a very low cost.
Having quality fighters on basic cable is a genius move if what we’re trying to accomplish is getting boxing – our sport – back into the general public consciousness. People who I had no idea were casual fans of boxing were talking about at least one of the several boxing events that aired Saturday night, isn’t that what we wanted this whole time? Some of you “fans” confuse the shit out of me.
Hey, is it just me or did Sugar Ray Leonard look like a confused camel after listening to Adrien Broner pontificate?
Think I’m an asshole? Let us know in the comments section below!
Thanks for joining us again this week. We’ll be back next Sunday with more run-on sentences, randomly assembled catchphrases and copy and pasted segments from J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Two Towers. Send all Andre Ward inspired hate mail to JESSEBOXINGTRIBUNE@GMAIL.COM or unfollow us on Twitter @JESSEBOXING. Until next time, sante.