The Sunday Brunch: T.B.E. Edition

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to a hotdog, ketchup and American cheese flavored edition of boxing’s number one mid-day Sunday Brunch style column. We ask the tough questions like: ‘what does Hulk Hogan’s headband do when the Hulkster powers down for the evening?’ And ‘If Floyd Mayweather fought Manny Pacquiao standing on Danny Garcia’s shoulders in a rubberneck/hardcore lumber jack tag-team extravaganza – who would win?’ We’re talking about the big night of boxing from the epicenter of 21^st century boxing, the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, Nevada, Earth. Hold on to your Gucci shades and make sure no one steals your red leather vest idea for an outfit, we are about to start the show. With that being said, I gave you your instructions in the dressing room, what I say you must obey – Cuidate, escucha me, toca los manos y buena suerte…Let’s get it on!

When Floyd Mayweather fights, it’s an event. It seems everyone is talking about it.  In places I thought I’d never hear a word about boxing, as in random gas stations or in my other job, before a big Floyd fight, Mayweather Mania is literally everywhere.

In my best estimation, this rabid (and short-lived) popularity is due to many people wanting to see Floyd Mayweather finally lose. However, there are many varieties of fans that this promotion attracted. There are the people who want to see the supposed best fighter in the sport work his magic on the biggest stage possible.

Aside from the hardcore boxing contingent, a large number of people are also lured by a sense of nationalistic pride – a strong desire to see their guy overcome steep odds, to see their countries’ hero draped in championship belts…To see Mayweather knocked out, sprawled on all fours in the center of the ring. It sounds exaggerated, and it is a bit, but there are many fans who want a concussive ending to Floyd Mayweather’s reign a top the boxing charts.

As far as Saturday nights’ challenger, a cock-sure and powerful young champion was turned away by perhaps the best fighter of the last 20 years. Floyd Mayweather, it seems, cannot be defeated. A fellow boxing scribe mused on a social network site about the possibility of Mayweather defeating Sergio Martinez and becoming a five division lineal champion. Historic, they would say.

The Showtime ‘ShowStats’ numbers were absolutely indicative of the action. In terms of jabbing, Floyd Mayweather more than tripled landed jabs. When it came to power punches, which is to say, anything other than a jab, Mayweather connected at 53%, while the 31% supposedly landed by Alvarez looked mostly deflected or otherwise nullified.

Canelo Alvarez, with his throngs of fans, managed to put up an exciting, if not spirited effort against Mayweather. In the later rounds, an exasperated Alvarez was swinging for the proverbial hills. He threw everything he had including his shoulder a few times – The foul was very Victor Ortiz-ish of him.

A solid jab that occasionally landed on Mayweather supplemented by Oscar De La Hoya’s “remedy” (which was apparently, swing at him and push him into the ropes), was what Alvarez was allowed by Mayweather to use the majority of the night. This ineffective strategy made Money Mayweather’s swift counter punches  all that more dramatic.

Was Oscar’s “blueprint” to beat Floyd Mayweather to grease a few palms in order to skew a few or all of the score cards? Anything is possible in boxing. I think it’s highly suspect that he checked into rehab just days before his charge’s biggest day. Perhaps he didn’t want to see Mayweather after he knew what would transpire in the ring.

Among the many positive attributes he has, Canelo possesses championship caliber whiskers. He ate big numbers of clean punches from the 45-0 champ and seemed largely unaffected. Aside from a small shiner under his eye and a crushed spirit, on the surface, Alvarez was physically unscathed.

A very mature 23 year-old, Canelo was able to reflect on why he lost when interviewed by Showtime’s Jim Gray. “It was simple, I couldn’t catch him. He was very elusive, he’s a great fighter. I didn’t know how to get him. He’s very intelligent… “ The introspective former champion would continue “He’s got a lot of experience. Honestly, I couldn’t find him. In the later rounds I felt frustrated and I recognize that he beat me. I tried to connect on him but I just couldn’t.”

When probed further about his level of frustration, Saul would go on to say “The frustration was there but simply he is a great fighter. We tried to catch him, that’s what we tried to do all day.” Then when asked about his sizable weight advantage, Alvarez responded candidly “The 15 pounds were negated because I couldn’t catch him. There is no doubt he’s a great fighter, a very intelligent fighter. There was no solution.”

Here’s what I noticed this week:

1. If  you read my Top 8 Things Canelo Needs to do to Beat Mayweather column (and I know that you did), then you’ll see that Canelo Alvarez took some of my advice, but not all of it. Would he have been successful if he followed my wisdom word for word? We’ll never know.
2. Alvarez is so white that you could literally see his organs with the purchase of the 74.99 high definition package.
3. You would think that with all the leather Floyd was landing on Cinnabon’s dense torso, that he would have some big-time bruising – but he barely looked marked up at all. Is this attributed to Mayweather’s lack of damaging punching power against a man who out-weighs him by nearly 19 pounds or the fact that Alvarez is just ultra-tough and resilient?
4. Danny Garcia impressed a lot of people with his convincing win over Lucas Mattyhsse. An underdog champion. It’s likely that Garcia will be the next winner of the Mayweather sweepstakes. If that’s the case, the banter between Angel Garcia and Floyd Sr. is going to be classic.
5. Adrian Broner looked like a cross dressing vampire with his red vest outfit. Doesn’t he have people around him to stop him from doing stupid shit? That question is rhetorical, of course he doesn’t.

I hope that everyone caught how discombobulated the judging was for this main event. C.J. Ross should be banned from everything not named BINGO. It’s sad that someone’s hard work and immense effort can be ruined by an inept, vegetable of a ‘judge’. Thanks for tuning in this week, team. Another Sunday Brunch is forthcoming. We are the flaked fleur de sel a top of your over-cooked filet mignon. See you next time, sante.

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